Home > Uncategorized > Out with the Old, in with the New

Out with the Old, in with the New

Finally, I have the time and motivation to write. I worked through most of the holidays, and went away to visit family for New Year’s. Last week was busy, as life returned to normal after the holidays. My goal now is to make “normal” different from what it was last year.

At the end of each year, I like to take stock of the past year and look ahead to the new year. I keep track of major milestones reached and set goals for the coming year. I used to enjoy staying home on New Year’s eve to do my year-end review (I must write a post some time about being a loner). One year I actually turned down two separate invitations to go out with very kind people who were concerned that I was home alone on New Year’s eve. A few years ago, though, my sister and her partner adopted a girl whose birthday is January 1. Since then, we have observed a new tradition of me going to visit them (they live 6 hours away, and I see them only 3 or 4 times a year) for New Year’s. I enjoy seeing my sister and her girls, but being with them is not conducive to reflection and goal-setting. My nieces are now 12 and 16, and in a few more years the younger one won’t care if Uncle J comes to her birthday, so I may be able go back to spending my New Year’s eves in peace with my goals. I can visit them at other times through the year when the driving does not include the risk of snowstorms.

Without New Year’s eve to myself to devote to my annual review, I sometimes drag it out over the first few weeks of the new year. So, here I am, well into January and just now writing my year-end post.

2011 was a difficult year. I spent much of it stuck in the past, and that’s a recipe for unhappiness and stagnation. I need to make 2012 a year of moving forward, of letting go of things that belong to the past and reaching out for new things. I read somewhere that depression can make you more likely to dwell on the past, so that may be part of what’s been happening. I’ve experienced more depression in the past year than in the five years before it. Hence the creation of this blog.

Because it was such a difficult year, it was also a time of learning and growth. I’ve read a lot, including several good self-help books, and in a separate post I’ll write about the books that made the biggest impressions on me over the past year or so. The insights I’ve gained from these books have changed the way I look at life, people and relationships. They have informed my thinking and reflecting about why I am the way I am, what I want and what I am capable of. I don’t have all of the answers, but I’m making progress. In fact, one of the things I learned last year was to seek progress, not perfection.

So, 2012 will be a year of working on doing a few things differently. Perhaps it would be more accurate to say “seeing things differently”, which is usually a prerequisite first step to doing things differently.

I want to have more compassion for myself and for others. We’re all in this together, all of us have wounds and scars, and none of us asked for any of this.

I want to stop limiting myself so much and trust that I can succeed at more of the things I want to do.

I want to spend less time dwelling on the past and feeling angry, and more time enjoying the present and preparing for the future.

That should keep me busy for the rest of 2012—and then some!

Take care of each other.

J

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Categories: Uncategorized
  1. January 13, 2012 at 8:07 pm

    Best to you in 2012! Looking forward to seeing your list of inspirational books. Peace. Reg.

    • January 13, 2012 at 8:18 pm

      Thanks, Reg. Wish I could manage to write as often as you do. Keep up
      the good work!

  1. January 31, 2012 at 9:26 pm

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